Mental Health: I Am A Domestic Violence Survivor By Paul Hibbert

Image © Paul Hibbert via Hibbert Home Tech

Let me start by saying Domestic Violence / Domestic Abuse is WRONG (albeit if it is physical, mental or both), end of, regardless of if it is a man or woman who is the victim.  However, you rarely hear it mentioned or shown about it happening to men.  This needs to change NOW!

Let me tell you from daily experience we don’t all cope well regarding our mental health, despite what others may think differently.

This video brought tears to my eyes and after watching it I knew I had to share it on my website.

Paul posted this video as part of men’s mental health awareness month.  He is an inspiration and has my total admiration and respect for his honesty here and his braveness in publicly speaking out the way he is here.  Like him I want men to know THEY ARE NOT ALONE and if I can help in any way to get that message across then I will.  The more this video is seen the better and hopefully it will help someone.

About Paul Hibbert

Paul Hibbert is a UK-based journalist creating a broad range of technical product reviews and tutorials primarily on the Youtube platform.

He creates videos using honesty and humour as his fundamental principles.

Audiences that would not usually be engaged with technology who watch him will get a unique perspective and an engaging presentation style that is otherwise absent from the technology sector.

Blog Posts

Notes And Links

Hibbert Home Tech – The image shown at the top of this page is the copyright of Paul Hibbert and comes from his official website.

Hibbert Home Tech on Facebook. 

Hibbert Home Tech on Twitter

Hibbert Home Tech on Instagram.

Hibbert Home Tech on TikTok.

Hibbert Home Tech on Patron.Like me, if you can, help support Paul with his funny, informative and entertaining content here or make a one-off payment on PayPal by clicking here.  In Paul’s own words, “There’s no pressure to donate anything at all, but if I’ve helped you and you’re feeling generous then your kindness is welcome.”

Regarding domestic abuse, this is advice from Gov.UK.  Click the link for more information.

If you are in immediate danger, call 999 and ask for the police.  If you can’t speak and are calling on a mobile press 55 to have your call transferred to the police.  Find out how to call the police when you can’t speak here

Household isolation instructions do not apply if you need to leave your home to escape domestic abuse.  

The Men’s Advice Line – This website is run by Respect and is a confidential helpline specifically for male victims.

ManKind Initiative – Official website.  Their confidential helpline is available for male victims of domestic abuse and domestic violence across the UK as well as their friends, family, neighbours, work colleagues and employers.

They provide information, support and a signposting service to men suffering from domestic abuse from their current or former wife, partner (including same-sex partner) or husband.  This can range from physical violence or object throwing to abuse such as constant bullying or insults.

Men’s Aid Charity – Official website.  Formed in 2006 to help provide practical advice and support to men who have been abused, Men’s Aid has grown to represent the views of many individuals both male and female and is committed to helping those who have suffered from bias in the legal system, Family Courts or any other areas.  They strive to remove bias and prejudice from all parts of our Society and focus on providing help and assistance to anyone, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, who may need it, in particular males.

For further help and advice for men being abused click here.

Women’s Aid – Official website.  They are coming together across society and communities to end domestic abuse.

UKSaysNoMore – Official website.  They seek to unite and strengthen a diverse community of members and organisations nationwide to actively take a stand against domestic abuse and sexual violence under one powerful, visual symbol.  The campaign provides open-source tools and resources for individuals and organisations to take action and get involved in making a difference.  Together they can challenge the myths and misconceptions around these issues, share resources and information, and ultimately work together to make real positive change.

Bright Sky – This is a mobile app and website for anyone experiencing domestic abuse, or who is worried about someone else.  The app can be downloaded for free from the app stores.  Only download the app if it is safe for you to do so and if you are sure that your phone isn’t being monitored.

If you are experiencing domestic abuse and need immediate help, ask for A.N.I. in a participating pharmacy. ‘It stands for Action Needed Immediately.  If a pharmacy has the Ask for A.N.I. logo (below) on display, it means they’re ready to help.  They will offer you a private space, provide a phone and ask if you need support from the police or other domestic abuse support services.

Image © Government via Gov.UK

Local History: The Birmingham Buddhist Vihara

Image © Frank Parker

On Saturday 17th September 2022,  I visited the Birmingham Buddhist Vihara in Osler Street, Ladywood, Birmingham as part of Birmingham Heritage WeekI never realised there was a Buddhist Temple in Birmingham so it was a pleasant surprise to find out there was and I am glad I went.

It is such a peaceful, tranquil, and friendly place to visit. I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you visit this Peace Pagoda.  

The Birmingham Buddhist Vihara Photos

Click here to see photographic memories of my day out.  

About The Birmingham Buddhist Vihara

In 1975 Dr. Rewata Dhamma, the Founder and Spiritual Director of Birmingham Buddhist Vihara and Dhammatalaka Peace Pagoda, was invited to England where he established a Buddhist monastery in Birmingham as his base.

Since his arrival in England in 1975, the majority of those who have called on Venerable Dr. Rewata Dhamma for teaching have been English.  Impressed by this, and wishing well for the future of Buddhism in England, he realized that the teaching would only become truly established here once the British themselves took responsibility for its development. Buddhism is not a missionary religion in the sense that is usually understood.  Religion cannot be imposed from outside; it must develop in line with the culture in which it finds itself and how best to do this can only be truly understood by people who are native to that culture.  On the other hand, it is also necessary for these people to have some depth of understanding of Buddhism itself and so they must have training and information available to them which is suitable to their cultural background and age group.

Interest in Buddhism from schools, colleges and universities has steadily increased over the years and the Vihara has become one of the major centres in the West Midlands serving this need.  As Buddhism becomes increasingly an accepted part of comparative religious studies so they welcome the many groups and individuals who need information and guidance from them.  This encourages further development of Buddhism and practice for seekers of Buddhist knowledge.

In 1998 he accomplished the building of Dhamma Talaka Peace Pagoda, after years of planning, as a suitable resting place for the royal relics.

The Peace Pagoda is the only purpose-built Myanmar-style pagoda in the UK and can offer a unique educational and cultural experience to visiting students and groups of all ages.  The pagoda is a miniature replica of Shwedagon pagoda in Yangon, Myanmar, which is one of the most important pagodas in that country.  Visitors to the pagoda may learn about Theravada Buddhist beliefs, practices and meditation methods; students can also be given the opportunity to try meditation for themselves.

You can read more information and see what they have to offer on their website here.

In front of the Birmingham Buddhist Vihara. Image © Frank Parker

A Guide To The Dhammatalaka Peace Pagoda

Read an online e-book version of A Guide To The Dhammatalaka Peace Pagoda here.

Download A Guide To The Dhammatalaka Peace Pagoda in PDF format by clicking here.

If you don’t have a PDF reader you can download one from here 

Opening Times

Opening times vary depending on what is going on at the time.

To see what events are happening and when click here.

Address

29-31 Osler Sreet

Ladywood

Birmingham

B16 9EU.

Telephone

0121 454 6591.

General Enquiries

For general enquiries click here.

School Visit Enquiries

For school visit enquiries click here.

Open Day

Visit the Birmingham Heritage Week website (link above) to find out when the next open day will be.

Blog Posts

Notes And Links

The image shown at the top of this page is copyright of Frank Parker.

The videos shown above are via YouTube.

The Birmingham Buddhist Vihara on Facebook.

 

Mental Health

Image © of cottonbro via Pexels

Something that has impacted most of my life.

You can read more about this important topic in my Decades section and in my blog posts below.

About Mental Health

Mental health is “a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community”, according to the World Health Organization (WHO).  Mental health includes subjective well-being, perceived self-efficacy, autonomy, competence, intergenerational dependence, and self-actualization of one’s intellectual and emotional potential, among others.  From the perspectives of positive psychology or holism, mental health may include an individual’s ability to enjoy life and to create a balance between life activities and efforts to achieve psychological resilience.  Cultural differences, subjective assessments, and competing professional theories all affect how one defines “mental health”.  Some early signs related to health problems are sleep irritation, lack of energy and suicidal thinking.

The History Of Mental Health

Early History

In the mid-19th century, William Sweetser was the first to coin the term mental hygiene, which can be seen as the precursor to contemporary approaches to work on promoting positive mental health.  Isaac Ray, the fourth president of the American Psychiatric Association and one of its founders, further defined mental hygiene as “the art of preserving the mind against all incidents and influences calculated to deteriorate its qualities, impair its energies, or derange its movements”.

In American history, mentally ill patients were thought to be religiously punished.  This response persisted through the 1700s, along with the inhumane confinement and stigmatization of such individuals.  Dorothea Dix (1802–1887) was an important figure in the development of the “mental hygiene” movement.  Dix was a school teacher who endeavoured to help people with mental disorders and to expose the sub-standard conditions into which they were put.  This became known as the “mental hygiene movement”.  Before this movement, it was not uncommon that people affected by mental illness would be considerably neglected, often left alone in deplorable conditions without sufficient clothing.  From 1840 to 1880, she won over the support of the federal government to set up over 30 state psychiatric hospitals; however, they were understaffed, under-resourced, and were accused of violating human rights.

Emil Kraepelin in 1896 developed the taxonomy of mental disorders which has dominated the field for nearly 80 years. Later, the proposed disease model of abnormality was subjected to analysis and considered normality to be relative to the physical, geographical and cultural aspects of the defining group.

At the beginning of the 20th century, Clifford Beers founded “Mental Health America – National Committee for Mental Hygiene”, after the publication of his accounts as a patient in several lunatic asylums, A Mind That Found Itself, in 1908 and opened the first outpatient mental health clinic in the United States.

The mental hygiene movement, similar to the social hygiene movement, had at times been associated with advocating eugenics and sterilization of those considered too mentally deficient to be assisted into productive work and contented family life.  In the post-WWII years, references to mental hygiene were gradually replaced by the term ‘mental health’ due to its positive aspect that evolves from the treatment of illness to preventive and promotive areas of healthcare.

Read more about The History Of Mental Health here

Mental Health Disorders

Mental health, as defined by the Public Health Agency of Canada, is an individual’s capacity to feel, think, and act in ways to achieve a better quality of life whilst respecting personal, social, and cultural boundaries.  Impairment of any of these is a risk factor for mental disorders, which are components of mental health.  Mental disorders are defined as health conditions that affect and alters cognitive functioning, emotional responses, and behaviour associated with distress and/or impaired functioning.  The DSM-5 is used as a classification system of various mental disorders.

Mental health is associated with a number of lifestyle factors such as diet, exercise, stress, drug abuse, social connections and interactions.  Therapists, psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, nurse practitioners, or family physicians can help manage mental illness with treatments such as therapy, counselling or medication.

Read more about Mental Health here.

The above articles were taken from Wikipedia and are subject to change.

Mental Health Conditions

The following list is from the NHS Mental Health page.  Click on each link for further help and advice on that particular condition.

Mental Health Charities

Anxiety UKOfficial website.  They were formed in 1970, by Katharine and Harold Fisher as a result of Katharine’s experience of agoraphobia and her desire to develop support for others similarly affected.  Since those early beginnings, they have grown to become a national organisation with an international reach, whilst retaining a user-led ethos – being run by and for those with anxiety.  Many of their small seven-strong staff team have their own lived experience and understand the distress, isolation and misery that anxiety can cause.  We’re here to help and can support you to find ways to control anxiety instead of it controlling you.

Bipolar UK – Official website.  Their mission is to empower everyone affected by bipolar to live well and fulfil their potential.

Birmingham MindOfficial website.  Birmingham Mind is the largest independent mental health charity providing services in and beyond the City of Birmingham’s boundaries.  Their website shows how they are promoting wellbeing and recovery, providing high-quality support and challenging the stigma of mental distress.

CALMOfficial website.  CALM stands for Campaign Against Living Miserably and they are taking a stand against suicide.  That means standing against feeling shit, standing up to stereotypes, and standing together to show life is always worth living.  125 lives are lost every week to suicide.  And 75% of all UK suicides are male.  They exist to change this.  They do it by provoking conversation, running life-saving services, and bringing people together so they reject living miserably, get help when they need it and don’t die by suicide.  But they can’t do it alone. Stand with them.

Mental Health Foundation – Official website.  Their vision is for a world with good mental health for all.   They work to prevent mental health problems.  Helping people understand, protect and sustain their mental health.  They will drive change towards a mentally healthy society for all, and support communities, families and individuals to live mentally healthier lives, with a particular focus on those at greatest risk.

Mind Official website.  Mind provide advice and support to empower anyone experiencing a mental health problem.  They campaign to improve services, raise awareness and promote understanding.  They won’t give up until everyone experiencing a mental health problem gets support and respect.

Rethink Mental IllnessOfficial website.  Their vision is for equality, rights, fair treatment and maximum quality of life for all those affected by mental illness, their carers, family and friends.  As one of the largest charitable providers of services for people living with mental illness, they are well placed to make a direct impact on the care people receive.  But they have a much larger vision too – to transform at every level the way our nation approaches mental illness.  Every year, our diverse range of information and support helps tens of thousands of people get through crises, live independently and feel that they do not have to face mental illness alone.

Samaritans – Official website.  Whatever you’re facing, a Samaritan will face it with you.  Every day, Samaritans volunteers respond to around 10,000 calls for help.  They are here, day or night, for anyone who’s struggling to cope, who needs someone to listen without judgement or pressure.  Samaritans are not only for the moment of crisis, they are taking action to prevent the crisis.  They give people ways to cope and the skills to be there for others.  And they encourage, promote and celebrate those moments of connection between people that can save lives.  They offer to listen and support people and communities in times of need.  In prisons, schools, hospitals and on the rail network, Samaritans are working with people who are going through a difficult time and training others to do the same.  Every life lost to suicide is a tragedy, and Samaritans’ vision is that fewer people die by suicide.  That’s why they work tirelessly to reach more people and make suicide prevention a priority.

The Blurt Foundation – Official website.  Think of them as the knowing nod.  You’ve seen it – a slight bob of the head, often accompanied by a smile.  A little movement that says, “I understand”, “I’m listening” and “I’m here for you”. That’s Blurt.  They really understand how devastating depression can be.  Jobs come to an end, relationships break down and lives can be lost, all through the effect of depression.  That’s why the work they do is so important – it not only changes lives but saves them.

YoungMinds – Official website.  The sheer scale of the problem we’re faced with can feel overwhelming.  More young people than ever before need support for their mental health and accessing that support quickly can make a critical difference to those young people.  Yet, most of the time those young people need to wait. And wait. And wait.  When it feels like nothing is there for you when you need it most, you feel alone.  For far too many young people, this is their reality.  When they need help and can’t get it, it feels like they’re being told they don’t matter.  YoungMinds have called their strategy ‘You Matter’ because, ultimately, that is what this is all about.

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Notes And Links

cottonbro on Pexels – The image shown at the top of this page is the copyright of cottonbro.  You can find more great work from the photographer and lots more free stock photo’s at Pexals.